Christine Rhyner

Christine's blogs

Infertility Is...
Saturday, October 19, 2013 by Christine

Infertility is...lonely.  It's a heartache that accompanies you wherever you go, whatever you do.  It waits for you to see a baby in a park before it bubbles up and brings you to tears.  It makes you stare at pregnant women's stomachs.  It leaves you out of conversations with friends and family about their children.  It makes you feel like you have a scarlet letter "I" for infertility stamped on your forehead.

If you live in a suburban area where people flock to buy their homes and build their families like I do, it makes you feel like you're the odd woman out in your own neighborhood.  You don't feel "normal."

Before we adopted I relied heavily on family and friends for support, compassion, understanding and prayer.  I overtaxed them and saw the tension in their body languages and endured the silence that would follow.  Worse yet, some told me not to bring it up anymore.  It caused me to feel shame and anger.

That's why it's so important to seek the Lord and bring all the emotions that accompany infertility to Him.  His Word says that he will heal the brokenhearted and bind up their wounds.  But it's also important to have people in your life that can understand your pain, like those you can find in an infertility support group.  RESOLVE is one, and there are others online that one can join.  Grief counseling is another option.

How I wish I'd made these vital connections when I was trying to conceive.  You see I am the only one of six sisters, three sisters-in-law and numerous cousins, nieces, friends, neighbors, etc, that was not able to achieve something I felt so basic and connected to my femininity that others simply take for granted.  Years later, my husband and I are still the only ones in a huge, extended family that have adopted.

Infertility can be lonely but we don't have to walk alone in the midst of our pain.  Reach out to those who can help.  Seek the Lord and His great compassion and comfort.  Know that you have options as you pray, to connect with others like you, remain "childfree" but perhaps work with children, seek medical interventions or bring a child into your heart and home through adoption.  Remember that weeping may last the night, but joy comes in the morning.  Praise the Lord.

Share This Blog:


Previous Posts

God's Presence With Wings
Christine
6/18/2021

The Church Needs to Unify in the Battle For Right to Life
Christine
6/10/2021

Our Sixty-Year Decline
Christine
6/1/2021

H.R. 1 Would Be A Bigger Test For The Church Than Covid Shutdowns {Part 2 of 2}
Christine
5/20/2021

H.R. 1 Would Be A Bigger Test For The Church Than Covid Shutdowns {Part 1 of 2}
Christine
5/12/2021

Dangers of Love Growing Cold
Christine
5/3/2021

Democrats' Despicable, Advantageous Use of the Elderly
Christine
4/23/2021

America, Land of Condemnation (Part Three)
Christine
4/15/2021

America, Land of Condemnation (Part Two)
Christine
4/6/2021

America, Land of Condemnation (Part One)
Christine
3/24/2021

Government's Desperate Need for Humility
Christine
3/11/2021

Is the Church Changing?
Christine
1/19/2020

What Are Our Values Anymore?
Christine
11/22/2019

The Final Frontier (Part Two)
Christine
9/4/2019

The Final Frontier (Part One)
Christine
7/29/2019

Soulmate
Christine
4/30/2019

The Colors of a Writer
Christine
12/29/2018

What's Not to Get About the Writing Life?
Christine
4/18/2018

Learning to Sing the Song of Winter
Christine
12/10/2017

Perspectives & the Second Half of the 10 Commandments of Conflict
Christine
8/25/2017

Perspectives & 5 of the 10 Commandments of Conflict
Christine
5/2/2017

Run Writer Run! Make Music with Your Words
Christine
2/15/2017

Mom, the Fishstetrician
Christine
10/14/2016

The CONSTITUTION For President
Christine
6/5/2016

The Radicalization of Hillary and the Democrat Party (PART 2 OF 2)
Christine
4/16/2016

The Radicalization of Hillary and the Democrat Party (PART 1 OF 2)
Christine
4/15/2016

Why Ted Cruz NOW?
Christine
3/19/2016

Why is the GOP Committing Suicide?
Christine
3/14/2016

Dear Chicago
Christine
3/12/2016

Does God Give Us More Than We Can Handle?
Christine
2/29/2016

That Unanswered GOP Debate Question
Christine
1/9/2016

America's Lifeline
Christine
12/31/2015

Fractured Nation (2 of 2)
Christine
11/14/2015

Fractured Nation (1 of 2)
Christine
11/11/2015

What is Orphan Sunday?
Christine
11/8/2015

November's Gratitude and Longing
Christine
11/4/2015

Losing a Child is Like...
Christine
9/12/2015

Finding God in a Tenement
Christine
9/3/2015

Doing School in the 21st Century
Christine
8/22/2015

Superstition vs. Planned Parenthood
Christine
8/19/2015

Addicted to Giving Birth?
Christine
4/21/2015

Why We Should Have "The Talk" Before Marriage
Christine
3/20/2015

Adoptive Parents "Hypersensitive" & "Selfish?"
Christine
3/12/2015

What's So Wrong With Calling It "Gotcha Day!"
Christine
2/26/2015

How God Connected the Dots
Christine
2/7/2015

Exposure of Transracially Adopted Kids to Their Races a Bad Thing?
Christine
2/2/2015

Out With The Old
Christine
1/12/2015

Those Who Scoff at International Adoption
Christine
8/16/2014

Setting Aside Birth Story Facts for Truth
Christine
7/31/2014

Sneak Peak, "How much did you pay for her?"
Christine
6/11/2014

Blessing Through Adoption Pain
Christine
5/16/2014

Eight Ways Publishing Your Book is Like an Adoption Journey
Christine
2/23/2014

Neglected Ministries?
Christine
2/17/2014

It's a Boy
Christine
2/8/2014

Thoughts of Her
Christine
2/1/2014

To My Son
Christine
1/30/2014

Rational Thinking?
Christine
1/25/2014

Minority Against Minority
Christine
1/12/2014

Happy New Year!
Christine
12/30/2013

Happy Thanksgiving
Christine
11/25/2013

You ARE my mother?
Christine
11/10/2013

The Transracially Adopted Children's Bill of Rights and Some Thoughts
Christine
11/3/2013

Infertility Is...
Christine
10/19/2013

Will He Speak English?
Christine
10/11/2013

Kitty-Sam
Christine
10/5/2013

What's in a Name?
Vhristine
9/30/2013

An Adoptive Mom's Message to Those in the Healthcare and Education Professions
Christine
9/25/2013

Being Tested
Christine
9/11/2013

When We Are Weary
Christine
9/1/2013

Trailblazers
Chrisrine
8/24/2013

A Fresh Start
Christine
8/22/2013

God Works Behind the Scenes
Christine
8/13/2013

Why Adoption Requires Forgiveness
Christine
7/28/2013

Dust Bunnies and Poo
Christine
7/19/2013

Reality Check
Christine
7/13/2013

Forgiveness is Work
Christine
7/9/2013

An Answer to Prayer, Part Three
Christine
7/3/2013

An Answer to Prayer, Part Two
Christine
6/27/2013

An Answer to Prayer, Part One
Christine
6/22/2013

Are They Really Brother and Sister?
Christine
6/16/2013

Infertility's Not Fair
Christine
6/13/2013

Has He Ever Eaten a Dog?
Christine
6/11/2013

Sometimes We Fail
Christine
6/9/2013